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Coincidental Acts

Posted by Rick · April 5th, 2005 · 1 Comment

Gas prices have been on the rise since, oh…about the year 2000. Since last spring, gas prices have risen faster than a flash flood in Shoal Creek, Texas.

Arm & Leg for Gas graphic

The Bush Administration has assured us through its press corp — that would be CNN, ABC, CBS, Fox and MSNBC, among others (but not The Daily Show) — that the fact that both President George Bush and Vice-President Dick Cheney first took office in 2000 and that both are former oilmen is pure coincidence.

Oh, and there were no oil CEOs on the secret Energy Task Force.

How do we know this? Because like OJ hot on the tail of his ex-wife’s killer, those self-same patriotic CEOs were hot on the trail of helping to concoct the story of Saddam Hussein’s WMDs.

A lot of people think the President of the United States is stupid. They frequently crack jokes about the fact that he needs to be electronically-fed answers to questions through electronic devices strapped to his back. Fact is, he’s anything but.

Ever since Ronald Reagan, the Republicans have understood that the real shell game of politics is in the show. Like a good game of Three Card Monte, they’ve understood that as long as the front man can play the part of red-blooded American Hero, the real power brokers can pretty much get away with anything. It’s no accident that some of the brightest stars in the Republican Party — their saviours — have been actors such as Ronald Reagan, the tough silent gunslinger from the past, and Arnold Schwarzeneggar, the tough silent gunslinger from the future.

And Bush? Well, if y’all’d been payin’ attention, you’d have known.

He comes from a long line of gunslingers.

Categories: The Bush Regime


1 response so far ↓

  • 1 Mark // Apr 6, 2005 at 6:07 am


    I will disagree with your assessment of Bush’s intellectual capacity. Like Reagan, Bush is a figure-head and is given a script by others who are really running the show. One huge difference is at least Reagan could read the script!

    I remember the first time when this guy ran for president, he promised that his close ties to the Saudis (and yes, they do give him a lot of money) would result in lower gas prices. He kept that promise about as well as the one about restoring “honor and dignity” to the White House.

    Of course, when you know what the vote-tabulating machines are going to say regardless of how votes are cast (as in Ohio), you don’t have to worry about keeping promises.

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